Skip to main content

DO U KNOW ABOUT "WHAT IS AN AUDIT"?

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road.

Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets out and asks the shepherd.

'If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?'

The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies, 'Okay.'

The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Website, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms and pivot tables. He then prints out a 150-page report on his high-tech mini-printer, turns to the shepherd and says,

'You have exactly 1,586 sheep.'

The shepherd cheers, 'That's correct, you can have your sheep.'

The young man takes one of the animals from the flock and puts it in the back of his Porsche.

The shepherd looks at him and asks, 'If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me ?'

The young man answers, 'Yes, why not?'

The shepherd says, 'You are an auditor.'

'How did you know?' asks the young man.

'Very simple,' answers the shepherd. '

Firstly, you came here without being wanted.

Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew.

Thirdly, you don't understand anything about my business.... '

'.....Now can I have my dog back?


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Good ? Bad ? Who Knows ? King Finger

Ajahn Brahm went on to give us a "King and His Doctor" story to explain that sometimes, bad things that happened in our lives can be a blessing in disguise. In old India, there lived a King who loves hunting. One day, he went hunting with his great Doctor. While hunting, the King was pricked by a strange plant on his middle finger. The finger became swollen and painful. The doctor applied a special ointment to the wound and bandage the King's finger. The King then asked, "Will my finger be alright?" The Doctor answered, "Good ? Bad ? Who knows ?" A few days passed and the King's finger became worse. He summoned the doctor and asked, "Will my finger be alright?" The Doctor answered, "Good ? Bad ? Who knows ?" A few days later, the King's finger was badly infected and has to be amputated from his hand. The King was furious and ordered the doctor to be jailed and hang in a month's time. Meanwhile, after a w...

The One Who Helped (jet pilot parachute)

Charles Plumb was a U.S. Navy jet pilot in Vietnam. After 75 combat missions, his plane was destroyed by a surface-to-air missile. Plumb ejected and parachuted into enemy hands. He was captured and spent 6 years in a communist Vietnamese prison. He survived the ordeal and now lectures on lessons learned from that experience. One day, when Plumb and his wife were sitting in a restaurant, a man at another table came up and said, "You're Plumb! You flew jet fighters in Vietnam from the aircraft carrier Kitty Hawk. You were shot down!" "How in the world did you know that?" asked Plumb. "I packed your parachute," the man replied. Plumb gasped in surprise and gratitude. The man pumped his hand and said, "I guess it worked!" Plumb assured him, "It sure did. If your chute hadn't worked, I wouldn't be here today." Plumb couldn't sleep that night, thinking about that man. Plumb says, "I kept wondering what he mi...

The Sinking Ship

There were three ships which were nearby when the Titanic sunk. One of them was known as the Sampson. It was 7 miles away from the Titanic and they saw the white flares signaling danger, but because the crew had been hunting seals illegally and didn't want to be caught, they turned and went the opposite direction away from the Titanic. This ship represents us and people like us if we are so busy looking inward at our own sin and lives that we can't recognize when someone else is in need. The next ship was the Californian. This ship was only 14 miles away from the Titanic, but they were surrounded by ice fields and the captain looked out and saw the white flares, but because the conditions weren't favorable and it was dark, he decided to go back to bed and wait until morning. The crew tried to convince themselves that nothing was happening. This ship represents those of us who say I can't do anything now. The conditions aren't right for it and so we wait until cond...